Game exists really for one simple reason, and it’s not exactly why you think it does. It’s not to get laid. That may be the reason men come to game, in order to “learn” how to get laid, and in the ironic twist of life, by trying to learn game, we can feed the monster that is causing men to not get laid. You start off learning tricks and lines and acronyms and you fit into a community and have your own band of brothers, either fellow men whom you go out to pick up with, or your online posse – then you eventually move to the actual rejection of game, and don’t need it any more. Now calm down people, i don’t mean rejection in that it doesn’t work, I mean that when you actually learn your final lesson of game, which is to be the aloof male, with the balance of emotions and not giving a fuck, then you realize all the other things in game are not neccessary for you anymore, and reading blogs on how to understand women or how to get laid isn’t neccessary, and thus you move one, in essence rejecting game as the bulk of things you used to build yourself to a man capable of getting laid, and not falling into the traps of women, are of little use to you anymore. Of course many men never reach this point, and I think this is the problem.
The reason men have trouble getting laid lies in our basic nature, a nature that allows us to succeed in every other area of our lives. We get a strategy in our heads (right or wrong) we get a target or goal (said girl or girls) and we activate strategy in order to get goal, making adjustments to our strategy or not making strategies to try and obtain our goal. Our whole thinking is in a straight line, and when things don’t happen according to the plan, we get sometimes obsessed on how to crack the system that will obtain this goal, or we get pissed off and swear off of it for good. If you’ve ever experienced dealing with women, you will know that none of them think and act in the same manner, no matter how much they’d protest to this. Women, due to their over abundance of male suiters and known sure things as options they can have sex with at their whim, on top of their non-linear behaviour lead men whom go after them with a strategy with the sole goal of obtaining the magic pussy, are so focused on them that girls who rely on how they feel and their great ability to pick up on subtle body language and social cues, naturally feel a repulsion to said strategy. Game exists for this problem. It’s whole make up is to wake you up to the fact that there really is no “strategy” to have sex with women.
Women will have sex with men that they find attractive and don’t screw it up. Men usually screw it up by declaring their attention that they want to get girls with too much obvious declarations, either saying it outright, plying her with loving rom-com like platitudes and planning of romantic and fun outings; or implying it subtely with everything you do sprinkled with the persperation of your desperate desire to get her.
Because we as men are straight line thinking and goal focused, when we have a goal in mind, we have trouble picking up the subtleties of the path to acheive goals – and unlike with every other path, there is little to no leeway to make mistakes. This of course adds to our drive or obsession to get the girl, and becomes often oneitis.
There is also a slight misconception of thinking that a girl wants to enter your world, and for you to take her on a journey, which is true, but only half of that concept, the other concept is that she wants you to enter her world and take control of that as well. See many critics of game accuse us of pussy begging or falling into a girls frame in order to get laid, but they miss that last part. It is true, if you aren’t able to get into her world, her ways of non-linear, emotional, and abstract world, you will never be able to get into her pants, and most importantly, if you don’t take control of that world for her, she won’t be completely in love with you, like the adoring females whom love their alpha males. All of which, whether on purpose or not, share these abilities and traits. Girls want to be saved from themselves, and it’s one of the reasons they still adore masculine men.
Removing the goal oriented strategy to get laid, is the only thing you need to do in order to get laid. You’re a man so you’re entire being is working to get you laid, let your instincts take over when they need to and stop thinking about how to win her, how to get her, how to change her mind, how to get her back, how to make her fall in love with you, etc. It is not about one individual girl, it is not about getting laid the most, it is all about being confident, in control, aloof, and emotionally balanced with a sense of trust in a girl is earned, as is comintment. That’s all it is.
Once you become this you won’t waste your time with girls who don’t want you. Girls will sleep with you or let you know when they’re attracted to you, you don’t really need to do much when they are, and thus, you realize, there is no game.
“There is no spoon….Then you will see it is not the spoon that bends. It is only yourself.” Inner game: the philosophical and empirical study of what is and is not. Internalized, it is your new self, and for you the spoon is a fork because a woman is more accurately a phase-shifting spork distressed by emotional weather. “Girls want to be saved from themselves, and it’s one of the reasons they still adore masculine men.”—in fork mode.
“God will provide;” the atheist has a simplistic and literal understanding of this statement, when in reality it’s a call to High Strategy, to the esoteric truths that can only be lived, not known.
Yoda: “Do or do not, there is no try,” is the same thing. Moving with grace – acting with right action – bearing burdens with dignity and humility. Once you understand this, the world itself becomes your mechanism and your tools, you don’t need mental constructs anymore.
Fake it ’til you make it – Game’s a necessary step, but only a step.
Nice and simple, good post Donlak. I have internalized so much of this for years that I’m indeed doing less for more results than ever before, with girls both 7 years older and younger than me. It’s a great feeling.
There is no spoon
Pingback: There Is No Game « PUA Central
“It is not about one individual girl, it is not about getting laid the most, it is all about being confident, in control, aloof, and emotionally balanced with a sense of trust in a girl is earned, as is comintment. That’s all it is.”
Amen. I would like to add to this if I might. By having the right attitude and exhibiting traditional “alpha” qualities – ie honourable behaviour, you will earn the respect of both men and women. You will certainly earn the admiration and respect of women who are available to sleep with you, as well as those who are not (ie – happily partnered). Like I have always said, build the foundations and everything else will fall into place.
There is nothing so off-putting to women than men who want and expect all the trappings of alpha success without putting in the hard yards. Some may disagree and say that women fall for “feigned” alphaness – yes, but without something to back it up, you really are skating on thin ice. Young men may have youth and looks as their back up to their “game” and once that is gone, their “game” is useless unless they have money.
I have started to realise this after putting up with a totally beyond omega work colleague of mine. He is young, single, well qualified/educated and some might say relatively good looking so you wouldn’t think he would have such omega instincts, but he does and all the women in our workgroup just CANNOT STAND HIM ! Yes, he gossips, bitches, back-bites, whines, complains endlessly about colleagues without having the guts to confront them about behaviour which he disapproves of. I can’t stand this quality in women but absolutely despises it in men.
Amen, xxxxx. Think life owes you a job, a house, a woman, magic weight loss and effortless happiness? Get used to a life of frustration and disappointment with that remote in your hand. Or you can watch this and actually do something with your life. Your choice.
“The Only Disability in Life is a Bad Attitude,” Matthew Jeffers, Letter to Baltimore Ravens (2013)
I’ve been saying this from the jump. You tell ‘um, I’ll hold the crowd back. Sorry I haven’t commented here before.
I’ll try and stop by more often.
Stay up.
so true. It’s all in the context. Some girls will beg you to take them, others won’t let you come within 5 feet of them. Let those in who think highly of you and cut those out who think lowly of you. As simple as that. Be people sorter.
Pingback: The Attitude | welcometothelifestyle
Pingback: Game (PUA) | Yasers hörna